When Rob came to my place when we were dating I always thought it was strange that he never brought over night clothes. I at the time, lived in Santa Cruz with my three male house mates, and he lived in the East Bay. So in my mind coming over to spend the day or even just the night would warrant some sleep wear and a change of something other than a shirt... I guess it may have crossed my mind then but I was just so twitterpated that it didn't matter.
I on the other hand, having thought about the fact that I thought he was so modest that it was kind of sweet. It was very low pressure. Actually, NO pressure at all. I kind of gave it away all up front. (I wonder if he regrets that about me sometimes.)
I thought that him sleeping in jean shorts must have been so uncomfortable for him, when really it was just male laziness. I know this because we have been married now for two years and he still sleeps in his shorts on a regular basis. Though if there were a fire he wouldn't be like me frantically looking for clothes to put on before I ran out of the house.
Well I thought he was trying as hard as I was to make the overnight thing just as magical as you see it in movies. I'm kind of a freak like that, so I try by always shaving/waxing, wearing makeup to bed, you know all the things that you wouldn't do if there weren't the prospect of new and exciting sex in the wings.
He wasn't. But that didn't deter me from trying my hardest. Now you must understand my motivation behind this was truly for the benefit of the morning after kiss. I suffered and still do suffer from, well its been called dragon breath. I am an avid gum chewer, I floss and brush at least three times a day and still its just horrible. I know it has to do with diet but I refuse to give up a lot of my diet so I deal with it how I can...
So I had the genius idea that if gum worked during the day it may as well work at night right? For the most part a flawless idea. I almost NEVER wake up with my mouth open unless I am horrendously sick so whats the worst thing that could happen?
One morning I woke up to find that the gum had rolled out of my mouth... part of it in my hair; and another part of it was on his shorts. This bright green lime mint gum was on his shorts! I'm sure you can imagine how much I freaked. This was so not in the realm of the perfect morning after.
Luckily I got the gum out of every where before he woke up, which I have to tell you was a miracle in itself because to this day I almost NEVER wake up before Rob. I brushed my teeth and slunk back into bed almost mortified and very plausibly; sure that he was somehow going to know what happened. He never found out.
But every morning I wake up to him in his jean shorts, I laugh to myself a little. Especially because he really could care less about the morning breath.
Those are the benefits of being married.
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